Saturday, May 18, 2013

The Price of Independence


The snow was falling, flake by lonely flake, on the frozen, muddy stable yards of the Independence Inn in Concord, Massachusetts. It was a cheery sight, that inn, on a warm summer night, when the stars and moon were out, and when the fields were burgeoning with waving wheat. It was winter now, though, and the wheat had not waved in the fields that summer, or in the summer before. The inn had melded into the grey, grimy, depressed landscape. The whitewashed walls were smeared with mud, the stables were draughty, and the pump had frozen over.
            Insides the inn, dirty rushes covered the hearth, and the smoky fire spat and grumbled under a pot of burnt stew. The dark shadows of the main room half-hid thickly-bundled farm boys and tired men.
            The proprietor of this place, a man named Heathery, corresponded to his dreary property perfectly. A small, scrubby man, unshaven with a queer red cap that looked like a fez perched on his head, he had the habit of peering sideways out of the corner of his eye at the people around him. He wasn’t a dishonest man, but his face looked shifty and stubborn. He sat behind the scarred wooden counter, rubbing the earthenware cups with a bit of tallow.
            The wind increased and sent the rushes shuddering on the floor. The door gusted open and closed again, and in between the wind ushered in a large bundle of fur and velvet on stocky legs and leather boots. Heathery surreptitiously removed a carved squirrel from the main counter and nervously fingered his rubbing cloth.
            “Ho, Heathery!” cried the thick-legged bundle heartily. “A blast of your best for this wretched night!”
            “Not much left,” grumbled the man. He sloshed whisky into a cup.
            “Business slow tonight?” inquired the velvet bundle, a hefty, well-fed man with a cheery smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.
            “Not so ee’d care to notice.”
            “Come now, man, it’s out of concern that I ask. I don’t want this place to run down to the ground before you leave it.”
            “It won’t be running to failure and I won’t be leaving it, thankee.”
            The man shrugged and sipped his drink lingeringly. “My offer still stands, and if you accept within the next week, I’ll double it. Come, you know you’d get more than it’s worth.”
            Heathery fidgeted with the cork, his tasseled fez wobbling. “I told ‘ee no. This inn’s all I’ve got and I won’t be giving it up.”
            “Not even to save your family? They starve. Most of your clients and boarders don’t even pay. Every time that rag-patch rebel army so near your heart passes through, you open your gates and cellars. The larders don’t fill themselves and your family can’t live on goodwill.”
            “I’m not selling anything but drink to the blasted English and whatever of their honey-poison spies that come around. On any luck, they’ll drink themselves to death.”
            “That’s not cordial.”
            “No, nor is traitorin’ and playing on a man’s misfortune.”
            “I’m offering you a way out of your misfortune, Heathery.”
             “It’s no bad luck to have a life of one’s own. I built this inn, and I’ll work it. It serves my purposes and my beliefs, and I’ll thankee not to interfere with either, Alexander Sindle.”
            Sindle leaned forward. “It’s no crime to improve your life. You wouldn’t be a traitor.”
            The little man’s chin jutted out and he jammed the cork onto the bottle. “Improvement of my life at the expense of other lives don’t go well with any Massachusetts man. As my name’s Ebenezer Heathery, I’ll play a part of this American independence, and this here inn won’t be turned into a redcoat barracks. I’d see it burn first!”
            Sindle gazed into the bottom of his glass. “His Majesty’s soldiers lack sufficient amusement for these long, winter nights. They need an unfrozen ground for their rebel burying. Fire unfreezes ground mighty well.”
            Heathery glared at him through the threat. In the corners of room, near the hearth, there was a quiet shifting, and sort of cough from the bundles of clothing and pipes. One man poked the fire, and others rubbed their scruffy chins. If there had been any more light in the room, more than one man might have felt the urge to absently polish the dull metal of his pistol.
            Sindle sensed this. He slapped a shilling on the counter and left with a ominous glare at Heathery. The sound of the spy’s horse’s hooves faded down the rutted road.
            Heathery replaced the carved squirrel. One by one, the rough bundles of clothing drifted out of the inn, some depositing a few coins of the counter.
            “Good night, Heathery.”
            “Keep warm, Ardel.”
            “Til later or death, Heathery.”
            “Godspeed, Marsh. Ride well to Washington.”
            The wind blew out most of the fire as the stubby man banked it for the night. He bolted the door, gathered in the cups, and left a lantern glowing in the window.
            Heathery moved slowly to the back of the inn, where his family’s apartments were. On a table in the large kitchen was a plate with a small potato and a bit of bread on it. The scrawny dog snuffled and growled in her sleep before the hearth. It was a homely room, with old tin pans on the shelves, and precious few onions hanging from the rafters.
            Heathery sank onto the stool to eat his supper. He knew how little was left in the cellar, and how few copper coins in the moneybag under his pillow. Sindle’s lucrative offer was inviting. Enough food for a cupboard, enough covers for a bed, enough education for the children. He rested his head in his arms in despair. There was a hard price to pay for independence.
            Outside, through the wind and the few floating flakes, a dark figure stole across the courtyard, around the chipped walls of the inn, and to the Heatherys’ back door. Under his arm was a basket, which he hung carefully on the harness-hook beside the doorway. With the cold night, the joint of precious venison and the cornmeal would keep. The figure stole away into the night again. The flakes fell slowly into the hollows of the frozen mud, and the dark night passed imperceptibly. The morning dawned, bright and new, and life stirred across the country, one day closer to independence.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

College ho!


“I will sing to the Lord, for He has dealt bountifully with me.” (Psalm 13:6)

That’s the verse that’s been sounding in my head and winding around every thought in the past day or two. He has dealt bountifully with me… He has, so generously. I’m going to college. Not only college, but also I’m able to study what I love in a country that I’m learning to love. I wish I could tell you face to face about everything God’s done for me since the May of last year. SAT exams, high school transcripts, the huge, huge variety of college choices, finances, college applications, essays, writing, paperwork… and then we went on furlough in November and the whole college world colored and came to life. I visited college, talked to professors and students, nearly wiped out under the deluge of literature and t-shirts, and marveled how God time and time again gave me guidance through the godly advice of His children.

A few months later, God clearly (but so kindly) closed doors to one university and opened the way to another. The end result is that in the fall term of 2013, I’ll be studying Shakespeare and Milton under the wide blue sky of the Rocky Mountains.

Where: the University of Colorado in Denver
What: to study English Literature & Creative Writing
When: to Denver at the end of April (classes start in August)
How: “Not by my might, or my power, nor by the strength of sword; only through Your love, my Lord…”
Why: I want to write well and to read great books because His Word is great, to gain learning and hopefully wisdom because He created knowledge, and to try and understand the world He’s placed me in

I’d like to say thank you to all those who prayed. Faithfully, strongly, humbly, you prayed and God answered. He worked in my life, He made my way clear, He gave me more than I could ask for. Thank you for your loving prayers, and I pray that God will bless you deeply for them. Please, don’t stop. The way is clear, but I need the courage, the wisdom, and the grace to run the course well and to God’s glory.

Thank you to my parents, grandparents, and family who prayed and helped and guided, and listened to my wild ideas, patiently endured my moans of “what on earth am I doing with my life,” and so kindly helped with the paperwork and the small things that made a huge difference. They happily got up at four in the morning to drive me several hours to various campuses, wrangled information out of officials, cheerfully marched into offices, and accosted students to ask matter-of-fact questions about dorm life and study habits. They constantly kept an eye on the big picture and very lovingly supported each decision.

And finally, thank You and praise to God. I’m just one life, one student searching for the right way to please Him and live for Him, but He loves me and He guided me safely to this point. He’s promised to lead safely home. His faithfulness throughout all of this has been so enormous, so loving, and so humbling. “Whom have I in heaven but You? And there is nothing on earth that I desire beside You. My heart and my flesh may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” ~Psalm 73:26

God’s granted me unbelievable goodness: the beautiful scenery of Colorado for four years, the wonderful blessing of my dad’s family nearby, and the whole coming period in my life that’s full of excitement and newness. How great is my God. My prayer for this year is to keep my eyes fixed on Him, that every word, every written essay, every hope, and every new idea may be to His glory, and that He may keep me humble and satisfied in Him alone.


So, college ho! It’s going to be so good. 


UCD on a winter morning


Thursday, March 7, 2013

His Highest

Today's daily devotion in Oswald Chambers' book My Utmost for His Highest has a stirring message that I'd like to share: abundant love, overflowing joy.
"If God is for us, who can be against us?... No, in all these things we are than conquerors through Him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present not things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."
Romans 8:31, 37-39
The Source of Abundant Joy
Paul was speaking here of the things that seem likely to separate a saint from the love of God. But the remarkable thing is that nothing can come between the love of God and a saint... The underlying  foundation of the Christian faith is the undeserved, limitless miracle of the love of God that was exhibited on the cross of Calvary; a love that is not earned and can never be. Paul said this is the reason that "in all these things we are more than conquerors." We are super-victors with a joy that comes from experiencing the very things which look as if they are going to overwhelm us.
Huge waves that would frighten an ordinary swimmer produce a tremendous thrill for the surfer who has ridden them. Let's apply that to our own circumstances. The things we try to avoid and fight against--tribulation, suffering, and persecution--are the very things that produce abundant joy in us. "We are more than conquerors through Him" "in all these things"; not in spite of them, but in the midst of them. A saint doesn't know the joy of the Lord in spite of tribulation, but because of it. Paul said, "I am exceedingly joyful in all our tribulation" (2 Corinthians 7:4).
The undiminished radiance, which is the result of abundant joy, is not built on anything passing, but on the love of God that nothing can change. And the experiences of life, whether they are everyday events or terrifying ones, are powerless to "separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord" (Romans 8:39)
~Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, March 7, "The Source of Abundant Joy"
More than conquerors. Undiminished radiance. Joy because of tribulation. We speak so often of "shining light and love" in the world around us, and particularly in painful times, but with true, abundant happiness? Contentment when your world constricts and pressures you like the bars of a dungeon cell? Joy in the midst of that?
According to the Apostle Paul, yes. He says simply that we're more than conquerors. Stronger than any possible army. Why? Our victory is certain. How on earth...? Well, God loves us. That's a truth, and nothing on earth, nothing in this life, nothing in existence can separate a Christian from the reality of that truth. God. Creator, Almighty Judge, King, the Former of our souls, the immortal, eternal, supreme God whose Presence is absolute and Whose power called the universe to existence. Loves. Ardent, forgiving, faithful, merciful, wholehearted, sincere, and perfect love. Us. Us, you. That tired, worried, fallible, burdened, self-deceptive, grasping, searching, soul-bearing bundle of thoughts, motives, insecurities, and ideas. God loves us. And because that truth exists, washed clear in the blood of God's own Son Himself; because the immortal unchanging God established it, that truth can never be altered. Such love, such truth, is a compelling reason for joy. According to one of John Blanchard's sermons, "God loves you as much now as He did the day He died for you."
That's a lot of love. Does it change your life? We're called to love as Christ loved. Would you joyfully give up your life, give time, give conversation, give prayer, for someone who didn't deserve it, so that they could have the same joy God intends for His children? Christ gladly did.